We met in April,I still remember the first time we talked and my first impression about you. I though you are so dumb and cute but I couldn't find anything interesting about you. You were trying to help yet you were asking me to help you. I left home smiling because of your clumsiness. Days were passing by,never thinking to much about you,my work was always on top and you were just...a shadow.
But one day,by the end of May you made me fall. It was so sudden and I had no idea what hit me. I tried to hide it and thought I was just crazy but my craziness became bigger and I had to say it. I had to say the words,I had to tell the truth,first to myself. I LOVE HIM. Yes,I was confused and scared. I was hoping it was just a joke and it will go away soon.
Yet weeks past and I found the courage to talk to you. At first it was boring discussion,I thought I was going crazy so I said it to you,I like you.
Amazingly you decided to keep talking to me like nothing happened. Actually after I said the words somehow we became friends. But I wasn't really happy with your answer so after a few months I decided to say it more clearly so I gave you the chance to choose if you want to be with me or become strangers. Again your answer shocked me,you just asked me to be friends. I still remember how angry I was before your answer and how I started to cry.
Even so months passed and we talked more and more and more. But I was lying myself trying to be your friend. Even knowing that you will never be mine my feelings were strong.
You left,I was devastated and scared,I didn't knew what I should do. I was scared.
Months passed and we didn't met,3 months to be exactly. I started to miss your voice and I was trying to keep myself somehow alive but I wasn't able to do anything like I had to.
After 3 months we met again,it was a lovely day and hearing you laughing was the best thing ever happened to me,you were laughing because of ME. By the end of the night you told me I'm cute and took me back to the train station and watched me while I was leaving.
I thought I was dreaming but it was so real,it hit me hard and my love became bigger for you.
But like every dream I had to wake up. And this was not a nice wake up moment. After 3 days you destroyed my soul when you got engaged and you were so happy. I could only pretend I am happy for you and you tried to make sure I was suffering like I was in hell telling me I should be the next one getting married. Why me? Why did YOU had to tell me that? Was I that horrible that you had to poison me with those words?! I cried,and cried and I felt the worst pain in my life. It was real pain,not just physical. My whole body was trembling. I tried to get away from you and decided to ignore you.
Weeks passed without talking with you,I even tried dating someone but of course I was still thinking about you. But I tried to run away from my feelings. I ended up like a little robot,I was only working and in my days off tried to get as drunk as possible but every time I was drunk I was thinking about you. But well,amazingly you started to talk with me. Weird things you said and I started to dream again.
Now I accepted my feeling and I just keep you as a friend,a friend I love more than I should but I;'m ok because at least I have you next to me. But something started to change. The way you talk to me is different sometimes and I wish to understand what's wrong with you. What do you want from me? Why is everyone telling me you like me,you are afraid to go out just with me? It was you who decided to get engaged,now why do you confuse me so much?
Last time we went out you were looking at me all the time and made me feel so weird but happy. That little chat we had and you laughing because of my clumsiness made my day and was so cute. so why me? Why do you now play this game? I love you!
Seems like my love story won't ever have a finish and even if it's gonna have a finish is not gonna be a happy one. But I love and that makes me feel so alive. So Thank You. Even if you will never love me just having you as a friend will be enough and I don't regret anything.
Months passed and we didn't met,3 months to be exactly. I started to miss your voice and I was trying to keep myself somehow alive but I wasn't able to do anything like I had to.
After 3 months we met again,it was a lovely day and hearing you laughing was the best thing ever happened to me,you were laughing because of ME. By the end of the night you told me I'm cute and took me back to the train station and watched me while I was leaving.
I thought I was dreaming but it was so real,it hit me hard and my love became bigger for you.
But like every dream I had to wake up. And this was not a nice wake up moment. After 3 days you destroyed my soul when you got engaged and you were so happy. I could only pretend I am happy for you and you tried to make sure I was suffering like I was in hell telling me I should be the next one getting married. Why me? Why did YOU had to tell me that? Was I that horrible that you had to poison me with those words?! I cried,and cried and I felt the worst pain in my life. It was real pain,not just physical. My whole body was trembling. I tried to get away from you and decided to ignore you.
Weeks passed without talking with you,I even tried dating someone but of course I was still thinking about you. But I tried to run away from my feelings. I ended up like a little robot,I was only working and in my days off tried to get as drunk as possible but every time I was drunk I was thinking about you. But well,amazingly you started to talk with me. Weird things you said and I started to dream again.
Now I accepted my feeling and I just keep you as a friend,a friend I love more than I should but I;'m ok because at least I have you next to me. But something started to change. The way you talk to me is different sometimes and I wish to understand what's wrong with you. What do you want from me? Why is everyone telling me you like me,you are afraid to go out just with me? It was you who decided to get engaged,now why do you confuse me so much?
Last time we went out you were looking at me all the time and made me feel so weird but happy. That little chat we had and you laughing because of my clumsiness made my day and was so cute. so why me? Why do you now play this game? I love you!
Seems like my love story won't ever have a finish and even if it's gonna have a finish is not gonna be a happy one. But I love and that makes me feel so alive. So Thank You. Even if you will never love me just having you as a friend will be enough and I don't regret anything.
